Playing the Innocent
by princessozmaofoz
Summary: There are good things and bad things about escorting your boss to a party. Sure, the food is superb and the Super looks stunning in an evening gown. But, the terrorists who abduct the two of you are not so charming. Slight Robbie/Jean
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: To my great dismay, I do not own any Lewis characters or story-lines. I do however own the few original characters who appear in this story and the plot of this particular fic.**

Chapter One

"Lewis!" called a commanding voice from the door.

Detective Inspector Robbie Lewis nearly fell out of his chair. Chief Superintendent Jean Innocent had that effect on most people. Incredibly shrewd and very efficient, Innocent had an uncanny knack for showing up just when Lewis and his partner DS James Hathaway were least expecting her. Her presence seldom boded well for the pair as Innocent was nearly always there to lecture Lewis and Hathaway on some sort of breach in procedure that they had inadvertently made in their investigations. Lewis quickly navigated away from the website that he had been perusing. He knew that Innocent would disapprove of his checking the cricket scores - particularly when he was _**supposed **_to be typing up an account of his latest case.

Innocent walked over to Lewis's desk, her arms folded across her chest.

"I hope you took the liberty of picking up your tuxedo from the cleaners."

Lewis felt a surge of relief overtake him. Innocent was only here to ensure that he was prepared for the party that he'd promised to escort her to- not to complain about his work performance.

"Yes, Ma'am, I did pick the tuxedo up yesterday."

"And, Lewis, _**please **_remember to run a comb through your hair this time."

Lewis wondered what it was about women that made them think that cleanliness and overall neatness were next to godliness. His mother had been the same way- never letting him leave the house until his shoes were tied and his shirt pressed. Even Val, the most intelligent woman that he had known, had scrubbed the already immaculate floor with a vengeance whenever company was expected.

"If he forgets, Ma'am, I'll be sure to remind him," called James Hathaway from his desk.

Lewis scowled at his sergeant. Hathaway had an especial gift for getting under the "governor's" skin- alternately either talking back to Innocent in that charmingly cheeky way of his or sychophantly sucking-up to the Super in the most odiously obvious manner. James also had a penchant for embarrassing Lewis in front of their boss.

"Thank you, James. I very much appreciate it," Innocent said, smiling pleasantly at Hathaway.

This annoyed Lewis even more. He knew that if he had made the comment, Innocent would have rolled her eyes. Yet, James had always had a knack for charming women- Innocent among them. This probably had something to do with the fact that the sergeant was tall, "dishy," and Cambridge-educated.

"So anyway, I'm leaving now to get ready. I'll be around to pick you up at eight o'clock," Innocent said, returning her attention to Lewis.

"Wait! - It's _**today**_?"

Innocent stared at him, an aggravated expression in her lovely eyes, as Lewis continued speaking, stammering desperately in an attempt to attempt to save face.

"It's just that I thought it was tomorrow, the _**thirteenth**_."

"Today is the thirteenth, Sir," said Hathaway, walking over to Lewis's desk to join them. "In fact," James continued, smirking, "today's _**Friday**_ the thirteenth."

"Oh, dear," Lewis muttered to himself. To Innocent, he said, "So, it _**is**_ today then?"

Innocent nodded and turned to Hathaway.

"Why do I get the impression that he only absorbs about a third of what I say?" she said, sighing dramatically.

Hathaway grinned. "You probably get that impression, because it's the truth, Ma'am."

Lewis opened his mouth to retaliate. Hathaway, seeing the inspector's reaction, quickly added "I'm just kidding, Sir."

Innocent didn't say anything. She merely turned on her heels and went. After she had left, Lewis addressed Hathaway.

"Is it so hard for her to apologize?"

"Yes," Hathaway said emphatically. "Even if she feels sorry about it later, you'll never get her to admit it; her bloody pride simply won't allow it."

Lewis sighed in frustration. "I've had about enough of her 'bloody pride.'"

"That _**is **_unfortunate seeing as you've agreed to spend an entire evening with both the Super _**and**_ her 'bloody pride.'"

Lewis groaned. "Don't remind me. I'm already worried enough about embarrassing myself."

Hathaway leaned back against Lewis's desk. "Remind me again, what is the purpose of this particular party?"

"The new American ambassador to Britain and his wife are taking the grand tour of England before he takes up his new post at the embassy. His wife was college roommates with the Oxford assistant dean of admissions who happens to be a personal friend of the Super's."

" … And so the assistant dean simply _**had**_ to throw a party for the ambassador and his wife, and the Super simply _**had**_ to attend, and Mr. Innocent simply _**had**_ to have been unavailable, and so you simply_** had**_ to escort the Super."

Lewis frowned. "Are you mocking me, Sergeant?"

"No, Sir, simply trying to understand the logic of it all," Hathaway said, grinning mischievously at the inspector.

"Well, you're wasting your time- there's no logic in _**any**_ of it."

Hathaway considered this for a moment before speaking up again.

"I've always wondered, Sir. Do you attend these things as 'Mr. Innocent' or as yourself?"

"Depends on me mood. Usually, the Super just introduces me as 'Robbie, and lets people draw their own conclusions. Sometimes, just for a lark, I do pretend to actually _**be**_ Mr. Innocent and find various ways to embarrass the Super behind her back in front of the other fashionable idiots. Other times, I just explain the actual situation to the other guests."

"Do you have any idea which role you intend to play today?"

"Dunno. Innocent's been making me feel quite stupid recently so I almost feel like giving her a taste of her own medicine. However, I always feel like such a prat after I embarrass her like that, so I probably won't do it."

James concluded that Robbie Lewis was a far better man than he was. _**He **_wouldn't have felt like a prat for giving Innocent the comeuppance that she deserved.. In fact, annoying Jean Innocent was one of James Hathaway's favorite things to do.

"There's another thing that I've always wondered about; why does she always ask you?" Hathaway asked.

"Simple, she knows that I loathe these things and makes me take her out of pure spite," Lewis said, lounging back in his chair.

Hathaway wasn't so sure about this. Laura Hobson had her own theories about Lewis's and Innocent's supposed "dislike" of each other, and although, James had initially been skeptical about Hobson's suspicions, he was gradually coming around to her way of thinking.

"Oh, come on, Sir. They can't really be _**that **_bad. I imagine the food is superb …and..." Hathaway glanced around to make sure that no one was around before completing his statement. "Just between us, the Super does look quite lovely in an evening gown."

"You want to go in my place, Sergeant?" Lewis said, only half-teasing.

"All right, then. _**I'll **_go to the party and dance and drink, and have a grand old time while **you** stay here and finish typing up this report."

Lewis considered this for a moment. He wasn't sure which of the two options was worse-taking Innocent to her stupid party _**or **_typing up another one of the Super's stupid reports.

"I don't think that you'd fit into my tuxedo," he said finally, taking in the sergeant's tall and lanky frame.

Hathaway returned his attention back to the computer on Lewis's desk.

"That is a blessing in disguise, Sir, because I doubt that Innocent will be happy with this account as it currently stands. I notice that you've managed to misspell the defendant's name twice in the first paragraph alone,"James said, shaking his head in disapproval at Lewis.

Lewis took a playful swat at James that the younger man carefully avoided. Lewis then checked his watch.

"It's getting late," Lewis said, grimacing slightly. "I... should probably go home and put on my tuxedo." He shuddered at the thought and then turned to James. "Want to come over and wait for the Super with me? I could use the company."

James agreed instantly. There was no chance in Hell that he would miss this golden opportunity to both torment Lewis further and see Innocent looking her most elegant in an evening gown.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Several hours later, Inspector Robbie Lewis stood in front of his bathroom mirror and adjusted the bow tie of his tuxedo. He studied his appearance thoughtfully and observed that he looked very odd in a tuxedo—not _**bad, **__per sé_, just out of place. Tuxedos were for movie stars, waiters, politicians, and secret agents—_**not**_ for middle-aged Geordie policemen.

A knock on the door caught his attention.

"I've already combed my hair, James."

"It's not that, Sir. I've something for you. Dr. Hobson just dropped it off."

"Come in, then."

Hathaway opened the door and walked into the bathroom, a single yellow carnation in his hand.

"For you, Sir," he said, handing the carnation to Lewis. "Something to remember the good doctor by while you're blinded by 'Innocence.'"

"Did Laura really say that?" Robbie asked, raising his eyebrows as he took the flower.

"Not in so many words, but her intent was clear enough. She bought it so that she could mark you as her property."

"Why would she need to do that?"

"She thinks that you and Jean secretly fancy each other."

Lewis cast a bemused glance in Hathaway's direction. The sergeant just shrugged his shoulders in response.

"I can't really explain it, Sir. Women-even women as intelligent as Dr. Hobson-are completely irrational at times. That's why…" Hathaway took a deep breath. "That's why… I've… I've decided to give them up for the time being."

Lewis snorted skeptically. "_**You, giving up women?**_ That's about as likely as Innocent giving up her bad temper!"

"Nevertheless, I'm going to try it," James said decisively. He silently resolved to give up men as well; he'd be able to get so much more work done if he wasn't constantly thinking about that 'special someone.'

"Good Luck," Lewis said sincerely. To himself he thought, '_He won't last a week_.'

"Thank you, Sir," Hathaway said brightly. "Are you going to put on your _**flower**_, Sir? I promised Dr. Hobson you'd wear it."

Lewis placed the yellow carnation in his button-hole and studied the effect it made by glancing into the mirror. He turned to James.

"How do I look, Sergeant?"

Hathaway briefly placed a hand over his mouth to cover a laugh. Then, he removed his hand and replied after a moment. "_**Very **_dapper, Sir."

A loud knock attracted their attention. Lewis groaned.

"I'll reckon that's the Super now."

The two men exited the bathroom and went to open the front door. As Innocent stepped into the room, Lewis felt his jaw drop. The Chief Superintendent looked—there was no other word for it—_**beautiful.**_ She was dressed in a floor-length, figure-hugging gown of dark crimson silk. She also wore a ruby choker and a pair of dangling ruby earrings that complemented the dress perfectly. Her light brown hair that had so often been pulled back in a no-nonsense twist now rested in loose graceful waves on her shoulders. Lewis heard Hathaway let out a low whistle beside him and noticed that the sergeant was positively gaping at Innocent.

"Ma'am, you look… absolutely _**incredible**_," James said finally, still staring at the chief superintendent in awe.

"Don't patronize me, Sergeant," Innocent said brusquely, but the self-satisfied smile on the Super's face suggested that she was actually flattered.

Lewis struggled to form a coherent sentence; he was still dazed by how attractive the chief superintendent looked.

"Hathaway's right, Ma'am. You do look… very nice." Glancing nervously at Jean, he continued stammering. "…Not that you don't always… look nice, I mean. It's just… Wow!"

"You look nice as well, Robbie," Jean said, sounding quite shocked.

"Always the tone of surprise," Lewis said.

Innocent turned pink. "I didn't mean it like that. Of _**course,**_ I'm not surprised that you look nice. I'm just not _**used**_ to seeing you so dressed up."

"Oh, right."

Innocent returned her gaze to Hathaway. "I see you managed to get him to comb his hair this time, James," she said.

Hathaway placed a hand on her shoulder, a gesture that might have been innocent enough-_**if**_the shoulder in question hadn't been bare due to the superintendent's strapless gown.

"Did you really think I'd let you down?" James asked, his eyes twinkling.

"No, I had full confidence in you."

Hathaway shot her one of his most charming smiles. "Well, I'm glad to know that I don't disappoint."

Lewis coughed violently in an attempt to attract the others' attention. James was acting far too flirtatious for someone who claimed to have sworn off women. He'd never be able to achieve his goal if Lewis wasn't there to constantly prod him in the right direction. Flushing in embarrassment, James promptly took his hand off of Innocent's shoulder, and he and Jean returned their attention to Lewis.

"All you all right, Robbie?" Jean asked, looking concerned.

"I'm fine. I just had a bit of a frog in my throat," Lewis said quickly.

"That's a nice carnation," Innocent remarked, glancing at the yellow flower still tucked into Lewis's button-hole.

"Dr. Hobson brought it over."

Innocent nodded slightly. "Ah, yes. Laura mentioned that she was thinking of doing that." The chief superintendent's brow furrowed in thought. "I thought I had advised her to get red." Finally Innocent responded, "She must have forgotten," although her face indicated that she didn't really believe what she was saying.

"I suppose that must be it," Lewis said weakly.

"Do you mind if I use your powder room just to freshen up a bit?" the Super asked Robbie.

Lewis once again questioned the sanity of the female mind. There was no way that Innocent could possibly look _**more**_ attractive than she currently did. Yet, she evidently thought that improvement was needed.

"No, I don't mind. It's the second door on the right."

"Thank you," Innocent said as she followed Robbie's directions and disappeared into the powder room.

After she'd gone, Lewis turned to Hathaway.

"Just so you know, Sergeant, I no longer have any desire to trade jobs with you."

"I don't blame you, Sir." James removed a cigarette from his pocket and lit it. He took a long, slow drag. "I don't blame you _**one bit**_."

"For someone who swears that he's sworn off women, you seem awfully aware of their attractiveness tonight."

Hathaway lifted up his hands in a placating gesture. "When I said that I was swearing off women for the time being, I didn't mean that I was returning to the seminary. I only meant that I didn't want to get involved in any _**serious**_ relationships. Surely, I'm allowed to_** look**_ at women."

"Just so long as looking is all you do where the Super is concerned. I hear the _**real**_ Mr. Innocent is not nearly as nice as I am."

"Assuming that he _**does**_ exist, I'd advise you to follow your own advice where the Super is concerned."

Lewis stared at him, incredulously. Surely, James of _**all**_ people didn't subscribe to Laura's ridiculous theory about him fancying Jean. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Hathaway merely shrugged and took another drag on his cigarette. Lewis frowned at him.

"I thought I told you not to smoke those ghastly things in my house."

"I don't remember you saying that."

Lewis folded his arms across his chest."Well, I'm saying it _**now**_."

"All right, then, I'll go. I really should be getting back to work on our _**report**_," James said, shooting a jealous look at Lewis. "Have _**fun**_, Sir, and remember what I've said. For a very wise man once wrote, 'The whirl of desire transforms the _**innocent **_mind.' I'm sure if he had known both of you, he'd have added 'and the inspector's heart' to the end of that line."

"Just out of curiously, which wise man was that?"

Hathaway walked over to the front door and turned to face Lewis. "King Solomon, Sir. It's from the Book of Wisdom-a book that _**I'd**_ consider perusing every so often if I were you." With a laugh at the scowl on his inspector's face, James opened the door and walked out of the house.

Lewis stared at the closed door, fervently wishing for the first time in a long time that James Hathaway had continued his studies in theology in lieu of joining the police force. The damned cheek of that boy! Lewis often wondered why he let Hathaway continue to tease and torment him in this manner. Maybe, it was because deep down, Lewis knew that needed Hathaway's brains in order to do _**his**_ job properly and Hathaway's brains came with the added pleasure/burden of the sergeant's sharp wit. Lewis heard the door of the bathroom shut and walking toward him, he saw the lovely stranger who still bore a remarkable resemblance to DCS Jean Innocent of the Oxford police.

"Where's James?" Innocent asked, glancing around.

"He went home."

"Ah. So… are you ready to leave for the party?"

"Yes, Ma'am," Lewis said aloud. To himself, he muttered "If_ only_."

He took a deep breath and followed his superintendent out the door.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

"A penny for your thoughts?" said a voice beside Lewis.

"That's about what they're worth right now," Lewis said, turning his head to face the new arrival, a powerfully-built, dark-haired man of medium height.

The man laughed. "You and me, both."

For the first time, Lewis noticed a coarse and foreign lilt to the man's speech. He held out his hand to the stranger.

"You must be the new ambassador, Mr.…"

"Hillsborough, but please call me Albert. 'Mr. Hillsborough' makes me feel so…" the ambassador made a disgusted face, "pretentious."

"I'm Robbie." He shook the ambassador's hand briefly. "I must confess though, Albert. I always thought that pretentiousness was a valued trait in diplomats."

Albert smiled. "Some might think so, but I've always disagreed. I myself value honesty above any other trait in a diplomat."

"That's admirable, seeing as honesty has become rarer and rarer these days."

"Sad, but true. In the words of the great Billy Joel, 'Honesty is such a lonely word.' But I think I'd rather be lonely and honest than popular and unscrupulous."

"Me too. So you're a Billy Joel fan, are you?"

"_**Devotee. '**_Fans' are inanimate objects. Do _**you**_ enjoy Mr. Joel's work?"

Lewis shrugged. "Yeah, some of it. I prefer Elton John, but Joel does have some wonderful songs."

"I admire your taste. Elton John is excellent as well. Who else do you like?"

Lewis stroked his chin in thought for a moment."Well, erm… let's see, not all of my favorite groups have traveled across the 'pond' yet, but as for some artists that you'd know… Phil Collins, U2, The Beatles…"

"Ah, The Beatles, you've just got to love them. My wife and I are stopping in Liverpool next so I can see the place where it all began. Mary thinks it's a waste of time, but there you go."

"How has your trip been going so far?" Lewis asked after he took a sip from the glass he was holding. The champagne was exceptional, but Lewis still would've preferred to be having a beer with James and Laura right now.

"It's been wonderful," Hillsborough said. "You have a beautiful country, Robbie."

" I'll drink to that," Robbie said, holding up his champagne glass. Albert clinked his glass to Lewis's and both men drank deeply.

"Anyway, you still haven't told me why you were looking so upset earlier," Hillsborough said.

Robbie glanced over at a group of people standing a few feet away from them. Innocent stood holding court at the forefront of the group, flanked by two female companions and a barrage of male admirers.

"Women, I just don't understand them," Lewis eventually said.

Albert nodded sympathetically. "Who does? What exactly seems to be the trouble?"

_'You wouldn't believe me if I told you,' _Robbie thought to himself.

"Well, it's _**her**_," Lewis said, gesturing in Innocent's direction. "She always guilts me into going to these parties with her—says that she'll be all alone and friendless. Then, the moment she arrives, she gets swept up by some group of people and doesn't give me a second thought. I feel awkward enough at these parties as it is, but it's even worse going at it alone."

"I know the feeling. I may be an international diplomat _**today,**_ but only a few years ago, I was just an idealistic young hick from the great state of Tennessee. Then, I went to Harvard Law on scholarship, fell in love with a Manhattan debutante, and the rest is history. Believe me—these parties do get easier; they just take some getting used to."

"I'm glad to hear it."

"Just out of curiosity, which of those lovely ladies is giving you grief? I know it can't be the ravishing redhead as my wife and I haven't been in town long enough to make waves, so that leaves the statuesque blonde and the queenly brunette. Which one is it?"

Lewis chuckled slightly. "Queenly" really was the perfect adjective to describe Jean Innocent; it simultaneously called to mind both the chief superintendent's regal elegance and her domineering nature.

"The brunette, I'm afraid."

Hillsborough took another look at Innocent before addressing Lewis again.

"She's very lovely, but she looks as though she'd be difficult to manage."

"I don't manage her; _**she **_manages _**me**_," Lewis said aloud. To himself, he added "Professionally _**and**_ personally."

Albert laughed. "How long has she been doing that?"

"Five years."

"I admire your persistence."

Lewis shrugged. "It's not like I have a choice."

"Too true," Hillsborough said dreamily. "Women do make fools of us all."

"You can say that again."

"But love_** is**_ worth it. I'm sure you and your wife feel the same way."

Lewis thought about explaining that Jean Innocent was his boss—not as Hillsborough evidently suspected, his _**wife**_. However, Robbie didn't feel like explaining the complicated situation. It still felt extremely odd to be dating one woman, escorting another to parties, and to still be very much in love with an absent third woman. It was easier to let Hillsborough draw his own conclusions from the thin gold band that Robbie still wore on his left hand.

"Yes, it is indeed worth it," Lewis said finally, thinking solely of Val.

Hillsborough glanced tenderly at his own wife while Robbie found his own gaze darting to Innocent. The chief superintendent was laughing merrily at a joke one of her companions had told. Her long brown ringlets seemed to dance behind her as she tossed her head back in mirth. Her smile was positively magnetic, and it made her seem so much more approachable than she was in the office where she rarely smiled. Lewis had only seen that kind of radiant smile on the superintendent's face a handful of times. It had, of course, been Hathaway who had brought it out on those occasions. Robbie suddenly wished that he possessed some of his sergeant's easy charm.

Lewis paused. _Where had that thought come from?_ It must have been work-related: the better he got along with Innocent, the easier his job would be. Then Jean stopped laughing and turned her head slightly. Her eyes met Robbie's, and the inspector felt a strange pang in his stomach. Lewis instinctively broke his gaze and began to stare at his feet. When he finally had the courage to look up, Robbie noticed that Innocent had returned her attention back to her group. Aware that Hillsborough had finally stopped staring at his wife, Lewis decided to continue his conversation with the ambassador.

"So, anyway, what were we talking about?"

"Love, I think."

"Ah, yes. That's right. Have you and your wife been married long, Mr. Hillsborough?"

"Two months," the ambassador said, beaming proudly.

"I can tell it hasn't been long. As me daughter would say, the pair of you have the 'googly-eyes.'"

"It's been wonderful," Albert said, his eyes lighting up and his cheeks flushing deeply.

"Why, Albert Hillsborough! I didn't know that diplomats could blush!"

"_**This**_ one can! Maybe if more diplomats were married to women like Mary, we might obtain a reputation for blushing."

"Your wife must be quite the woman, then!"

"Why don't you see for yourself?" Hillsborough said grinning. "Mary!" he shouted across the room to his wife. "Come over here; there's someone I want you to meet!"

The Oxford natives stared at the American quizzically. Shouting across the room to one's spouse was clearly a _faux pas _in this highly formal and reserved town. Meanwhile, Mrs. Hillsborough whispered something to Innocent, and the pair of them giggled into their hands. Then, Mary Hillsborough walked over to Robbie and Albert.

"Mary, I want you to meet my new friend Robbie, a fellow admirer of Billy Joel and the Beatles."

"Pleased to meet you, Ma'am," Lewis said affably, holding out his hand to the new arrival.

"The same to you, Sir," the petite redheaded woman turned to Albert. Although Mrs. Hillsborough's accent was also American, it was a thought more refined than her husband's, probably the result of a more cultured upbringing. She continued. "Why don't you come with me to meet some of_** my**_ new acquaintances?"

Hillsborough followed Mary over to Innocent's group, and having nothing better to do, Lewis went with the pair of them. He looked over the diverse collection of people that his chief superintendent chose to rub elbows with, noticing that the blonde woman who had been standing with Jean and Mary earlier had left the group.

" This is Mr. Merwin," Mary indicated a short, jolly-looking man with a shock of wild hair. "Mr. John Tarleton," she said, introducing a rail-thin man with an enormous mustache. "And Mr. Thomas Lionel," Mary gestured to a tall, arrogant-looking man with auburn hair who was eying the chief superintendent with a look that was far too lecherous for Lewis's comfort. "Everyone, this is my husband, Albert Hillsborough, the new American ambassador to Britain."

Albert had shaken the hand of each gentleman as he was introduced, making eye contact and smiling amiably at each. It seemed that his inner diplomat came out quite naturally in this sort of setting.

"Mary, you still haven't introduced me to your female friend," Hillsborough said, glancing at Innocent.

"Oh, you're right, how silly of me! May I present Jean Innocent, Detective Chief Superintendent of the Oxford-shire police force."

"_Enchanted,_ Mrs. Innocent," Albert smiled pleasantly at Innocent. "I've already heard a good deal about you from your husband."

Innocent studied Hillsborough curiously. "I wasn't aware that you were acquainted with my husband."

Hillsborough gestured at Lewis, who was still standing beside him. "Robbie and I have become real—what is it you Brits say again?—oh, yes, _chums_ in the past few minutes."

Jean suddenly coughed very violently. Thomas Lionel instantly inquired after her health as he shot a very dirty look in Lewis's direction.

"I'm fine, Mr. Lionel," Innocent said firmly. She turned to the American ambassador and attempted to clarify her relationship with Lewis. "Mr. Hillsborough, Robbie is… That is to say… we…" Innocent said, stammering frantically and anxiously twirling a lock of hair around her finger.

Robbie watched her interestedly. It was really quite enjoyable to witness the chief superintendent fumbling to explain herself, completely devoid of her usual wit. Lewis knew that he needed to savour this moment; he was sure that it would not come again anytime soon.

Hillsborough smiled. "Don't worry, my lady. Although Robbie did admit that you make a fool of him, he also said that you're worth it."

Innocent smiled her radiant smile, and once again, Robbie marveled at how it much prettier it made her appear. "Did he?" Jean replied. "That's noble of him."

"He must think that you're quite the remarkable woman," Albert said.

Innocent flushed a bit while Mr. Lionel snorted suddenly and everyone glanced at him curiously.

"It's really not that profound of a statement. I only met her twenty minutes ago and even _**I've**_ come to that conclusion."

Jean turned an even deeper shade of crimson and eventually decided to end the subsequent awkward silence by returning the subject to its original topic.

"I didn't realize that you think I make a fool of you, Robbie. I was always under the impression that it was the other way around—namely that_** you**_ make a fool of _**me**_!

Lewis suspected that the chief superintendent was alluding to the close scrutiny that she had received from the chief constable after the media became informed of a significant procedural error that Robbie and James had made during one of their investigations. Upon reflection, he had to admit that he _**had**_, in fact, made Jean Innocent's life very difficult at times. He felt a bit guilty for a moment before he remembered that Jean Innocent had made _**his**_ life even more difficult than he had made hers.

"I guess you're just a pretty pair of fools," the plump Mr. Merwin said jovially.

Robbie wasn't sure about that. In her red dress, Innocent did admittedly make a _**very **_pretty fool, but Lewis didn't believe that he himself looked quite as endearingly foolish.

"Now, who have we got here?" said a new voice. The attractive blonde woman who had been standing with Mary and Jean earlier had rejoined the group.

Mrs. Hillsborough took command. "Robbie, Albert, this is our host for the evening, Ingrid Temple. She was my roommate at Princeton years ago and we've made an effort to keep in touch. Ingrid, this is my husband Albert. And I'm sure that you've met Jean's husband Robbie before."

Ms. Temple shot Innocent a very bemused look. Robbie strongly suspected that the assistant dean of admissions was acquainted with the real Mr. Innocent.

"Unfortunately, I haven't had the pleasure. Hello, Robbie," Ingrid Temple finally said.

"It's nice to meet you. Just out of curiosity, how do you know the Sup—I mean… how you know … Jean?"

"We went to school together for many years," Ms. Temple, looking at Lewis almost appraisingly. Although she was tactful enough to spare Jean any embarrassment, it was obvious that Ingrid was quite curious about the man who was pretending to be her friend's husband. She continued, "I don't think Jean ever told me how the two of you met."

Innocent shot Robbie a look that clearly said something along the lines of '_If you mess this up, I swear that I will make your life a misery.' _

" Er…well… I… She … er… she was working on an investigation and I …"

" … Soon came under her closest scrutiny?" Ingrid finished.

Lewis nodded. _**That **_was certainly true enough. He continued. "I had to work my tail off, proving to her that she could trust me. Sometimes I feel that I'm _**still**_ fighting to prove myself."

Everyone glanced expectantly at Innocent.

"It's not that I don't _**trust **_you, Robbie," the chief superintendent said finally. "It's just that you're a bit … irresponsible at times."

"Aren't you going to defend yourself?" Albert asked Lewis.

Lewis shrugged. "It's pointless to try. She'd just prove me wrong in front of all of you."

After a moment of uncomfortable silence, Albert Hillsborough turned to Thomas Lionel.

"So, Mr. Lionel, would you care to introduce me to some more of your friends?"

"But, of course. You all are free to join us," Lionel said. Although he spoke to the entire group, his eyes never left Innocent's.

"The rest of you are free to go," the chief superintendent said. "I need to have a quick word with … my husband."

Thomas Lionel took Innocent's hand and raised it to his lips.

"It was a pleasure to meet you, Jean. I do hope that we'll see each other again."

_Jean?_ Innocent and Lionel had reportedly known each other all of twenty minutes and yet Lionel felt completely comfortable calling the chief superintendent by her first name. Meanwhile, Robbie had known Innocent for over five years and he wouldn't have dared to do as Lionel had done—at least not to Innocent's face. And the way Lionel had kissed her hand! What sort of prat went around kissing women's hands anyway? This wasn't the bloody Middle Ages! Lewis found that he was gripping his champagne glass much tighter than he normally would have as he waited for Innocent's response.

"Goodbye, Mr. Lionel," Jean said simply as she withdrew her hand from Lionel's.

Thomas Lionel walked away with the rest of the group, leaving Innocent and Lewis alone.

"Tell me something, _**darling,**_" the chief superintendent said mockingly to Lewis. "Do you ever _**think**_ before you open that overlarge mouth of yours?"

_'Well,'_ thought Robbie, 'I_ guess some things never change_.' The chief superintendent may have _**looked**_ like a completely different person tonight, but underneath the crimson silk, still lurked the same cold heart.

"Sometimes, Ma'am. Other times, I just speak my mind without thinking of the consequences."

The chief superintendent's beautiful eyes flashed fire. "I hope you realize what you've done, Robbie. I've never been so humiliated! The American ambassador now believes that I'm some sort of vindictive shrew who plagues your life and heart out!"

If Hathaway had been there, he probably would have pointed out that this last statement -at least-was somewhat true. Lewis, however, had the sense to recognize that goading a furious Innocent was not really any less dangerous than baiting a bull.

"Not to mention the fact that one of my oldest and dearest friends now thinks that I'm a bigamist or -at the very least- an adulteress!" the chief superintendent said; her eyes were penetrating as though she could see into Robbie's very soul.

"To be fair, Ma'am, I never told Mr. Hillsborough that we were married. He came up with that theory on his own."

"But you didn't _**correct **_him, did you, Robbie?"

"By the time I realized that he thought we were together, it was too late to correct him."

Innocent's already prominent scowl grew deeper. "Couldn't you have at least said something nicer about me instead of making me out to be such a bitch?"

Robbie rolled his eyes disgustedly. "Oh, I suppose you'd rather I fawn over you the way that idiot Lionel did a moment ago?"

"Thomas Lionel is _**not **_an idiot! He's one of the wealthiest and most powerful men in the bloody city! He's given thousands of dollars in scholarship money to the university. Not to mention the countless hours of _pro bono_ work that his legal firm has performed! He's a wonderful man … attractive… charming… well-bred…."

"Oh, don't tell me you _**fell**_ for his ploy! I thought that you were cleverer than that! I'm sure he's had lots of practice _**posing**_ as the knight in shining white armor. Take it from a man, Ma'am, there was nothing charming _**or**_ well-bred about the way he was looking at you. The gleam in his eyes was _**not **_chivalry; it was lust, plain and simple. His thoughts just now were not about scholarships _**nor**_ were they about helping poor sods that can't pay their legal expenses. I'm sure he spends all of his time trying to think up ways to convince attractive women to climb into bed with him."

She stared at him incredulously. "Robbie, you're being ridiculous."

He snorted skeptically. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

"I can take care of myself."

"Oh, I _**believe**_ that, Ma'am, but it never hurts to be careful."

"Why do you care so much?"

He paused. He wasn't entirely sure that he knew the answer himself. "I... I can only say that I have your best interest at heart.

"If I didn't know _**better,**_ Robert Lewis, I'd say that you were jealous!"

"What on Earth on have I to be jealous of?"

"You tell me."

'_Jealous,' _Robbie thought angrily, '_Impossible!'_ Innocent clearly overestimated her own importance in his life. Why on earth would he be jealous of Lionel? Then, he remembered seeing Innocent in her ballgown for the first time. If he was really honest with himself, he had to admit that his thoughts had not been that much purer than Thomas Lionel's at the moment. He pushed the memory out of his head thought out of his mind. There was Mr. Innocent to consider—and Laura. Laura, who was just as attractive as Jean Innocent, though infinitely more agreeable than the chief superintendent.

A tall server with a dark beard walked by with a plate of _hor d' oeuvres_. Lewis gestured over to him, and the man came over. Lewis set down his champagne glass on a nearby table and took a chocolate truffle off of the waiter's tray. Robbie popped the chocolate into his mouth and began to chew. His eyes closed in sheer ecstasy. It was completely worth taking bloody Jean Innocent to her stupid party for this moment alone. After he'd finished, he opened his eyes and took another truffle off of the tray. He turned to Innocent.

"Open up, Ma'am?"

"What are you doing, Robbie?"

"I'm tired of listening to you shout at me. I want you to eat this chocolate. Trust me; it _**will**_ sweeten your temperament."

"You can't order me around!"

"Actually I can. As you may recall, I _**am**_ Mr. Innocent for the evening."

"You are the absolute person from whom I expected chauvinism. Do you _**honestly**_ think that I let Mr. Innocent boss me around like this?"

"Oh, so you emasculate him the same way that you emasculate me and James?"

"How on earth do I do that? I'm just trying to do my bloody job—which is far more stressful than it looks, I might add!"

"You just _**have**_to call attention to every itty-bitty thing that James and I do wrong—don't you?"

"Actually I _**do**_ or the chief constable will make my life a misery."

"Mr. Innocent must be a pathetic excuse for a man if he lets you boss him around like this."

"I can assure you that Mr. Innocent is _**very**_ much a man."

"He can't be much of one if he can't even find the time to escort his wife to parties after she's gone to so much trouble to get dressed up."

Innocent's face fell and Robbie immediately realized that he'd gone too far. He suddenly felt extremely guilty about what he'd said.

"I'm sorry, Ma'am."

She took a deep breath and avoided his gaze. "You don't have to apologize, Robbie."

"Please, just take the chocolate. You'll feel better. I promise."

"Actually, I'm... I'm sort of... watching my weight at this time."

"Don't try to get out of it by claiming you're on a diet, because you don't need to go on one. You're perfect just the way you are."

Innocent stared at him intently. Lewis, meanwhile, had just realized the potential implication of what he'd just said. He quickly changed the subject.

"Come on, Ma'am. Live a little. Have some fun for _**once**_ in your life."

He held the truffle up to Jean's face, and the chief superintendent tentatively opened her mouth. Lewis inserted the chocolate into the opening, a surge of electricity flowing through him as his fingers accidentally brushed against her lips. Innocent closed her mouth and Robbie took a step back. The chief superintendent's eyes immediately lit up as she began to chew. When she had finished, she smiled.

"You were right, Robbie. I do feel better. That was delicious."

"Would you care for another?"

"No thank you. I've had enough for tonight. I don't have any chocolate on me—do I?"

Lewis studied her for a moment.

"Actually there is a bit by your lip."

Innocent wet a finger and began dabbing at the left side of her mouth.

"No, not there." He took her finger between his own thumb and forefinger and guided it down her cheek "There," he said when they'd finally reached the spot where a tiny glob of chocolate glistened just above her chin. He removed his hand and grabbed another truffle of off the server's tray, trying not to think about the alluring scent of violets that he had smelled when he had leaned into Innocent.

"Is it gone? How do I look?" Innocent said when she'd finished attacking her face.

"You're glowing, Ma'am."

"I'm what?"

"Glowing."

It was true. As Robbie continued to look at her, Innocent seemed to grow more and more blurry, giving the chief superintendent an ethereal glow about her.

"Are you okay, Robbie?" Innocent asked, her face showing a rare concern for the inspector who caused so much grief.

_'No,'_ thought Robbie. _'I'm not okay. I'm stuck with you at this dumb party where you've spent half evening completely ignoring me and the other half making me feel like a bloody idiot, all the while looking absolutely irresistible." _Wait—that couldn't be right! Robbie attributed this last thought to the fact that he'd had too much champagne. The alternative was unthinkable. He couldn't be lusting after Innocent. She was his boss and quite possibly the most disagreeable woman he'd ever known—and that included all the heartless murderesses that Lewis and Hathaway had put behind bars. But Jean Innocent _**did**_ look and smell very enticing tonight and the hand that she placed on Lewis's forehead to check his temperature _**was**_ very soft.

"You don't seem to have a fever. Are you sure that you're all right, Robbie?"

"I—I…" Robbie began, but he found himself unable to finish. His feet seemed to suddenly give out on him, and after a moment, everything went black.


End file.
